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The golden rule of online dating: If you’re attracted to someone, try a witty joke as an icebreaker. Or just beg them to look at a picture of your dick, either’s fine.

1.

So hot when a guy says, “pleeaasseee.”

2.

“Wow, a stranger who loves cooking! I hope they send me a photo of quiche and- oh. God. Not again!”

3.

And the same guy tops off his exhibitionism with quite possibly the creepiest fetish ever.

At least he’s thinking clearly – wouldn’t want to break your phone.

4.

This douche majored in Dick-Pic Philosophy. (Click to the right to see more of his idiocy)

View post on imgur.com

5.

This laconic cock salesman is in disbelief.

 

 

 

6.

This charmer is just as smooth.

 

 

 

Come on man, you have to give at least one more buffer line of back-and-forth before you command a stranger to promptly perform fellatio.

 

7.

At least he’s committed to showing her his dick in real-time.(Click to the right to see more of his idiocy)

View post on imgur.com

8.

It ain’t just women who are given the offer they can’t refuse.

Maybe he genuinely did want to compare penises? And why does he hate eye brows so much?

9.

Good news gals! You can be harassed for nudes by anyone, from anywhere in the world!(Click to the right to see more of his idiocy)

View post on imgur.com

It’s not his fault he was “quite ready” for sexting. (The entire convo is cringeworthy)

10.

“Would I like to see 9 inches of what, sir?”

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