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11 Dummies Share The Stupidest Things That Happened While They Were Busy Checking Out A Woman

 

Look, we’re all human. Sometimes when an attractive person passes us by, we can’t help but get a little distracted. Unfortunately, sometimes getting distracted ends in disaster. A recent AskReddit posed a simple question: “Men of Reddit, what stupid thing that happened while you were gawking at a beautiful girl?”

And man, these guys had some hilariously dumb stories. Here are 11 of the our favorites.

1. 1Shortof2 learned a valuable life lesson that day.

I was on a family skiing vacation in Norway when I was 13. I was cruising down the slopes when I see the most beautiful, perfect, start a war over her beauty coming down the slopes beside me. I completely lose my composure and just stare. I stared all the way into the pine tree I didn’t see rapidly approaching. No injuries, just the realization at the age of 13 beautiful women will be the end of me.

2. Judging by 1jobonthislousyship, plowing into stationary objects is a common theme.

I met a Russian exchange student with a face that looked like he’d gotten the bad end of a bar fight. I asked him what the other guy looked like, and he said, “Not guy. Girl.”

Apparently, he’d been biking to work, gotten distracted by a girl, and ran face-first into a lamp post.

“Was it worth it?”

“Definitely.”

3. Ehkrickor is a real-life Looney Tune.

I fell into a hole.

Full story. I was working at philmont for my second year. My department was setting up a staff event and she was jogging the trail near the frisbee golf course. We were walking kinda perpendicular & crossed the path behind her & then I straight up Looney tooned into a pit. Complete with popping up afterwards with an “I’m okay!” I guess she had stopped when she heard the crack of the branch I fell on so she saw my head pop up out of the hole and started giggling, she was stunning and it was very hard to focus on work around her. The bruises were totally worth it.

4. ForThe_LoveOf_Coffee can’t be trusted as a workout buddy.

I forgot to spot my buddy in the gym and gave him a mouth full of testicles when I attempted to save him from his failed bench press

5. chalz108 almost hit the police car in front of him…

I was driving and gawking at a pretty girl jogging one time. A highway patrol officer was in front of me and another car in front of him, the car in front of him decides to turn left, while the car is waiting for oncoming traffic to pass so he can go, I’m starring wide eyed at this girl and the cop is a sitting duck in the road. I have no idea. I come down the hill at like 35mph and slam on the brakes only to stop like 3 inches from his rear bumper. My heart is pounding after what had just happened. I look up at him and he’s looking at me in his mirror shaking his finger back and forth. He was well aware of what I was doing.

6. …And whiteknightfluffer‘s friend actually DID hit the car in front of him.

Passenger in my buddies jeep driving on campus, super hot chick walking parallel to us on the sidewalk. As we pass her my buddy goes full rubber neck status and BAM! we smack into the car in front of us stopped at the stop sign…

7. Wow, so many driving stories. Something tells us NArcadia11 probably didn’t get his license that day.

I mounted the curb and scraped the shit out my bumper while checking out a girl in a mini skirt.

During my driver’s test.

8. absolutemonsterxx just has a thing for walls, okay?

I was checking out a girl and my friend noticed so he was like “What are you looking at?” I lied and said “The wall.” Now it’s become an inside joke like “You like that wall over there”

9. We’ll give JazzManOS the benefit of the doubt and chalk this up to bad luck.

Basically happens everyday at work. I just recently got a promotion, so now, I’m the boss of a lot of cute college girls (work at a research center, so lots of lazy college girls work here due to the flexible schedule and easy fucking job – literally just calling people to do surveys). Well, before my promotion I would talk to some of these girls, be real flirty, etc., because there really weren’t any consequences.

Now that I’m their boss, my entire demeanor at work has undergone a change. Not really ethical to be flirting with girls at work, so now, it even feels wierd to be checking girls out.

Well, we had a new-hire come in for training last week. Pretty cute girl, not a dime or anything, but cute. Tall, blonde, midwestern girl, really friendly. Well, it must have been like her second or third day. I was walking around the office, making sure the interviewers weren’t sitting on their cell phones not doing their jobs. I decide to go into the break room to grab a soda from the vending machine. Well, new blonde girl is in there, bent over and grabbing a drink from the machine. Tight blue jeans… ugh. I couldn’t help but look.

Well, instead of turning around and walking out of the room like I should have, I pulled my wallet out to grab a dollar bill for the machine. She gets up and turns around – I don’t think she saw me looking, but I’m sure she noticed; girls know. I ended up dropping my wallet and a condom fell out. I tried to pick it up quickly, but she saw it, didn’t say anything, just walked out of the room. I didn’t see her face, so I don’t know if she was smiling, laughing, blushing, etc. I was too embarrassed.

So now, one of the cute college girls at work probably thinks one of her supervisors is a creep ass trying to suggest things by “dropping” a monster condom for his magnum dong.

Feels great man.

10. JaredK91‘s cousin may have tipped a little too much.

Me and my cousin went to McDonald’s drive through and the girl working the window was at least an 8 and when she said the amount owed my cousin just handed her his wallet lol.

11. Ah yes, PM-ME-YOUR-TUMMIES, because aren’t all women looking for someone who loves their “boogery face?”

I worked with a very pretty girl and we were sitting at the break table across from each other having coffee and she was reading a book. I just kinda zoned out looking at her reading, gosh she was so pretty. Eventually she looked up and noticed and asked what I was looking at.

I said “Your boogery face ya butt!” then I blushed, giggled and went to wash my coffee cup.

What a delightful bunch of dummies.

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