Staring from across the room.
Contrary to what vampire movies and rom-coms may’ve led you to believe, prolonged eye contact is pretty risky. Staring is the knife throwing of flirtation – if it works, you’ve got skills, but if it doesn’t, oh boy.
Rating: 2 (5 if you’re good looking)/10
Liking their newest Facebook/Instagram post.
This is tricky because you might get mixed in with all the other, non-romantically interested folks who genuinely liked their post, but go for it. After a while, at the very least, they’ll look at you as a reliable, guaranteed ‘like’ – and that has to count for something.
Liking their Facebook/Instagram posts that are over three months old.
This is a thing that makes the average person’s heart stop when it happens, because it’s an accident. Fingers tap the wrong thing and it’s a catastrophe. So no, this isn’t a means of flirtation you want to invest in.
Laughing at everything they say.
Jokes? Laugh. General statements about anything other than like death or something sad? Laugh. People like to feel funny – be the generous crowd appreciating their unofficial standup routine.
Rating: Hahahahaha 7/10
Buying someone a drink.
Spending money on overpriced alcohol to draw interest? It could spark a conversation, but you have to not suck during that interaction, or you just opened up a bad-at-flirting tab, and it can’t be closed until you learn to not rely on money for expressing romantic interest.
Rating: $11 for a vodka & Red Bull/10
Favoriting a tweet.
A fav on your tweet is probably the most unsatisfying social media acknowledgment in existence. Favs are almost a slap in the face, considering the retweet option is right next to it. Don’t flirt via the fav, folks, that really shouldn’t be a thing.
Being super nice.
Some say it’s a first class ticket to the friend zone, others think it’s just the way you always should be. In terms of interacting with someone you’re romantically interested in, being nice has to be better than being a jerk… right?
Rating: Depends on how attractive they find you on a scale of 1-10/10
Jokingly being a jerk, engaging in banter, all things sarcastic are not only increasingly popular, but often it works. People who like each other feel comfortable with playful mocking being the language they speak to each other.
Nope. Also, any flailing elbows to the face received from people who hate being tickled are well deserved.
Rating: Seriously, stop!/10
Talk about how attractive you find them to one of their friends, and hope the friend relays that information.
Ah, the classic middle school, middleman move. Is it cowardly? Maybe. This is kind of the hail mary pass of flirting – there’s that slight chance it’ll be a touchdown, but more than likely this will end anti-climatically for you.
Be yourself, but express interest as it feels appropriate.
Ask for their number, ask them to go out sometime, whatever. The key when being yourself is that yourself has to not suck, and most folks aren’t entirely convinced they don’t at least kind of suck, hence why people utilize other stale tactics.
Send a walkie-talkie to their job, and ask them for a date on said walkie-talkie in front of all of their co-workers.
Will Smith did it in Hitch, why shouldn’t we regular, not scripted movie character people be able to try it?
Rating: 75-yard restraining order/10