Everyone wants to make movies, but only a select few get the opportunity to do so. That’s why it’s so frustrating when a movie makes an obvious and awful mistake. Somewhere during the filmmaking process, somebody had a terrible idea and it somehow ended up in the movie—and it ruins everything. These aren’t just bad ideas, these are outright mistakes that should have cost somebody a job.
FANTASTIC FOUR (2015) – NAKED THING
There are obviously a lot of mistakes made in Josh Trank’s Fantastic Four reboot. It might not have been the best idea to make a dark, gritty version of the iconic team, but it’s at least an understandable decision. What’s not understandable is the Thing’s lack of pants. Who ever read a Fantastic Four comic and thought “why isn’t the rock monster superhero naked?” The first rule of superhero movies ought to be “everyone wears pants.”
STAR WARS: A NEW HOPE – SPECIAL EDITION (1997) – GREEDO SHOOTING FIRST
The Special Editions of the Star Wars movies aren’t really that bad. There are just a few additions. Which completely ruin the whole thing and make fans want to kick the TV down a flight of stairs. The most infamous example of revision gone wrong is the scene in Mos Eisley Cantina where Greedo shoots first. (You knew this one was coming.) In the original version of A New Hope, Greedo is a bounty hunter who confronts Han Solo, a wanted man. Han keeps Greedo busy while slowly unholstering his blaster, and then shoots Greedo while the two are still sitting at the table. The Special Editions changed the scene so that Greedo fires a split-second before Han does, making Han’s shot defensive. It ruined the scene, because Han shooting first shows that Han isn’t heroic, but he would grow and change by the movie’s end. This scene makes his arc through the movie more important, and it’s significantly hurt in the Special Edition.
SPIDER-MAN 3 (2007) – DANCING PETER
Spider-Man 3 might not be the most popular movie, but it has some pretty solid moments. It’s also got a lot of silly moments. The movie was borderline decent, until one scene in particular derailed the whole thing. Possessed by an alien symbiote, Spider-Man alter ego Peter Parker is acting more aggressive than normal. How does this manifest itself in the movie? Peter goes to a jazz club and dances to impress Mary Jane. He jumps on tables, slides around on chairs, and makes the audience watching feel embarrassed for him.
WILD WILD WEST (1999) – GIANT ROBOT SPIDER
Back in the late ’90s, Will Smith was on fire. After massive hits like Independence Day and Men in Black, he seemed unstoppable. Then came Wild Wild West. Loosely based on a TV show from the ’60s, the movie was a weird combination of western and science fiction. The whole thing culminates in a scene where a giant mechanical spider attacks the President’s railroad ceremony. The spider is such a huge part of the movie, and it just doesn’t belong. Nothing says wild west less than a giant robot spider. Nothing.
BATMAN & ROBIN (1997) – ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER
There were a lot of mistakes made during the production of Batman & Robin. Joel Schumacher was going for a campy tone like the ’60s Batman TV show, but he just went too far. The biggest mistake in the movie was the casting of Arnold Schwarzenegger as Mr. Freeze, especially when you consider the other characters in the movie. They could have cast Schwarzenegger as Bane, a giant muscular villain who’s stronger than Batman, but instead they cast Arnold—the former body builder—as a scientist. How does that make any sense?
TERMINATOR SALVATION (2009) – NOT FOCUSING ON JOHN CONNOR
Ever since the first Terminator movie, fans have wanted to see a movie about John Connor leading the resistance in the future. Terminator Salvation was supposed to be that movie, but that’s not what we got. Instead, the movie focuses on some other guy who was half-human, half-Terminator, and all boring. The movie features Christian Bale as John Connor, and then makes him a secondary character. That’s not just dumb, it’s mean.
HALLOWEEN: RESURRECTION (2002) – BUSTA RHYMES
Out of all the slasher icons, Michael Myers was always the classy one. He wasn’t a comedian like Freddy Krueger, and his movies were always a little scarier than the ones starring Jason Voorhees. That all changed in Halloween: Resurrection. Busta Rhymes is an amazing rapper, but he’s not a great actor. He plays a character written specifically for him, and things get a little too silly, even for a slasher movie. In a kung fu fight between Busta Rhymes and Michael Myers, everyone loses.
TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES III (1993) – ADDING TIME TRAVEL
The filmmakers behind Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III didn’t want to just rehash what had already been done in the first and second movies, which are about the ninja turtles fighting the foot clan. The third movie, on the other hand, is about the turtles time traveling to feudal Japan. It’s such an insane jump that comes out of nowhere. The movie was a disaster, and it’s all because of the time travel story. It’s understandable for a sequel to try new things. At least make those things fit in with the other movies in the series.
THE WORLD IS NOT ENOUGH (1999) – DENISE RICHARDS
James Bond movies always have a Bond girl. It’s a tradition, and Denise Richards fits the definition of what a Bond girl should be. The problem isn’t that she was cast as a Bond girl, it’s which Bond girl she was cast as. In The World is Not Enough, Richards plays a nuclear physicist named Christmas Jones. Obviously the Bond movies aren’t meant to be super realistic, but casting Richards as a scientist is just going too far. Richards isn’t the best actress, and playing smart is the hardest thing for her to pull off.
THE X-FILES: I WANT TO BELIEVE (2008) – NO ALIENS!
While The X-Files was huge cultural phenomenon during the ’90s, it quickly faded into obscurity. Fox hoped to reignite its fanbase with the movie The X-Files: I Want To Believe. The movie focuses on a serial killer that steals body parts and a psychic priest trying to locate him. While that’s the sort of story that would have fit in The X-Files, the show was mostly known for being about aliens. The series ended by revealing the date for the end of the world…so watching Mulder and Scully chase a serial killer felt a little disappointing. Fans were hoping to see that story continued, and instead had to deal with a killer-of-the-week plot.
THE LOST WORLD: JURASSIC PARK (1997) – T-REX BOAT ESCAPE
Being the sequel to one of the biggest movies of all time meant that The Lost World: Jurassic Park had a lot of expectations to live up to. You’d think that the filmmakers would’ve put more thought into the movie. The climax shows a T-Rex getting loose on the mainland, which should have been awesome. It wasn’t, because the way it happens makes no sense. Somehow, the T-Rex eats the crew of the boat transporting it, and then locks itself back in the cargo hold just so it can have a dramatic reveal when the boat arrives on the mainland. Instead of wowing the audience, the scene makes viewers scratch their heads, thinking, “…wait, what happened?”
ROBOCOP (2014) – PG-13
The original RoboCop is a classic ’80s movie. It’s so over-the-top violent and ridiculous that people couldn’t help but love it. Everyone knew that it would eventually be remade, because that’s how things work. The original movie was a satire of ’80s culture, so it made sense to update the movie for modern audiences. Unfortunately, the filmmakers of the reboot tone down the violence to get a PG-13 rating. What made the original RoboCop stand out was how silly the concept was compared to the brutal violence shown throughout the movie. When it’s toned down, the reboot just becomes a generic action movie about a cop…that’s a robot.
BRAM STOKER’S DRACULA (1992) – DRACULA’S HAIRCUT
Francis Ford Coppola’s Bram Stoker’s Dracula is a weird movie. It has a distinctive look that sets it apart from the classic interpretations of the vampire. For the most part, it works, and the movie is pretty good. Dracula goes through several looks in the movie, and is mostly terrifying. But then there’s the beginning of the movie, when he still looks like an old man. Everything is appropriately creepy about him—except his haircut. It’s such a silly looking haircut that it ruins the whole tone of the movie. Instead of being unsettling, the entire beginning of the movie is just dumb.
PEARL HARBOR (2001) – NOT FOCUSING ON THE ACTUAL ATTACK
If you make a movie about a major historical event, then make that the focus of the movie. All of the advertising for Michael Bay’s Pearl Harbor made the movie look like an action-packed historical movie. Whether or not the film itself was in good taste, fans were expecting wall-to-wall action. Instead, the story focuses on Ben Affleck and Josh Hartnett falling in love with the same girl. It takes too long to get to the part everyone wants to see. Not only that, the attack happens in the middle of the movie, meaning that after the attack, there’s more boring love story to deal with.
14 MOVIE DECISIONS SOMEONE SHOULD’VE BEEN FIRED FOR