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14 People Who Called 911 Over Their Own Drugs

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There are plenty of times when dialing 911 during an emergency is the only sensible thing to do. If you’re a drug dealer whose product has been stolen, however, calling the cops is really, really stupid. Everyone on this list made their dumb crimes worse by making dumb 911 calls over drugs. Most of them ended up in jail as a direct result of their misguided attempts at consumer protection. For this list we look at criminals who called 911 over drugs, which ultimately lead to their downfall. We’re not saying they’re the dumbest 911 calls of all time, but at the same time we kind of are.

We’re not here to be the fun police. If you like to get hopped up on goofballs from time to time, that’s cool. But if your goofball dealer shortchanges you or gives you bag of bad goofballs, don’t go crying about it to 911, because they don’t care. Remember, there’s not a better business bureau for goofballs. Read on to see the dumbest 911 calls over drugs that have ever happened.

It’s a well known fact that if you do too many goofballs you can turn into someone who maybe isn’t the sharpest cookie in the tool shed. You need no further evidence of this than this list of people that called 911 demanding refunds or complaining about drug deals gone wrong. If you ever end up making a dumb 911 call, don’t worry, in most states it’s only a misdemeanor to misuse an emergency line. Don’t mention us, though, we steer clear of all goofballs, especially the kind of who call the police to report stolen drugs or disreputable dealers.

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  1.  

    Too Stoned? Maybe Don’t Call the Police

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    A 22-year-old man in Austintown, Ohio got a little too stoned for his own good. The over-indulger called police claiming that he was “too high” from smoking marijuana. When cops got to his house, they found him moaning in the fetal position, surrounded by Doritos, Pepperidge Farm Goldfish, and Chips Ahoy cookies (of course). He told them he couldn’t feel his hands, probably from smoking all the pot in the pipe and joints the police found around the house and in his car. Despite the emergency call, the man refused medial treatment. Here’s hoping the Dorito-therapy finally kicked in.

    Source: The Vindicator

  2.  

    She Broke My Heart and Ran Off With My Cocaine

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    If someone steals your cocaine, they’re probably not your friend. If your wife steals your cocaine, it was probably never meant to be. A romantic at heart, Robert Collins called 911 in Ohio to complain that his wife took off with his powder. He made the call despite that fact that, at the time, there was already an active warrant for his arrest. By the time police showed up, he’d cottoned to his mistake and refused to tell the cops why he called in the first place. Don’t worry, they figured it out.
  3.  

    Satisfaction Not Guranteed

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    We’ve all been given the wrong change before. Dexter Price’s dealer refused to give him the proper change after Price paid $60 for just $20 worth of crack. Luckily, Price did the sensible thing: smoked all the crack he had and called in a complaint at 4:30 in the morning. For some reason, Price initially demanded that police send over a canine unit. It’s unclear whether any police dogs were present when he was arrested for disorderly conduct.
  4.  

    Don’t Do Meth, Kids!

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    Kaleb and Shannon Mickely called 911 in May of 2015 to report a an intruder breaking into their house. When Eagle County Sheriff’s deputies arrived, they heard gunshots coming from inside the home. The authorities didn’t find the imaginary intruder the Mickelys were shooting at, but they did find ALL the meth. Husband and wife were arrested on several charges including felony drug possession, reckless endangerment, and child abuse.

     

  5.  

    The Customer’s Not Always Right

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    A Texas woman couldn’t leave well enough alone when her dealer sold her a bag of “bad weed.” She called 911 with her grievance after the dealer refused to give her a refund. When police arrived and asked if this woman did, in fact, have the pot with her, she ponied up the baggie she’d been hiding in her bra. Surprise: she was promptly arrested.
  6.  

    Sugar Sugar, Dummy Dummy, You Are My Candy Girl, and You’ve Got Me Wanting Crack

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    Suzanne Basham was looking to buy some crack cocaine, but she paid $40 for what  turned out to be nothing more than sweet, sweet sugar in a baggie. Since she had an entirely different kind of high in mind, Basham called the police in Springfield, Missouri to demand her dealer’s arrest, as well as a refund. When the cops found her crack pipe, though, she was cited for possession of drug paraphernalia.
  7.  

    Buyer’s Remorse

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    After shelling out $50 for some low grade cocaine, Florida woman Katrina Tisdale called the St. Petersburg police to help her get a refund. Her declaration that she would be broke until her next Social Security disability check showed up in the mail didn’t do anything to convince the police to help her out. When the first call didn’t work out, Tisdale actually called the authorities a second time. Believe it or not, she was arrested for misusing the emergency call system.
     
  8.  

    Butt Dial Ends in Jail Time

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    A note to anyone taking part in illicit activity: lock your phone or you could end up like this dummy from Nashville who accidentally called 911 on himself. When operators heard the man casually chatting about drugs and hanging out at a dealer’s house, they dispatched the police to his area and busted him red handed. Or red cheeked, if you prefer.
  9.  

    High Guys on Epic Journey at the Local Park Call Cops for Directions

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    If you’re going to get supremely high and call 911, Canada seems like the place to do it. A K9 unit was sent to a small park in Barrie, Ontario to “rescue” two stoners who went a little hard in the paint and got lost in the middle of a busy park. Since they live in the Great White North, the stoners were just taken to a hospital, but if they were in America they probably would’ve spent a night in the slammer.
  10.  

    Do Drug Dealers Report to the Better Business Bureau?

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    Arlene Starks does not mess around. She keeps it real. But sometimes, keeping it real goes wrong. When her dealer charged her too much for some weed, Arlene did what any concerned citizen would do and called the police. Unfortunately, the cops didn’t feel much sympathy for her consumer complaint and arrested her for misusing 911.
  11.  

    Fool Me Once, Shame on You. Fool Me Twice, Shame on Me

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    In North Carolina, a man referring to himself as “Dave” called 911 to complain about a drug dealer who took his money and failed to deliver the $80 worth of marijuana and cocaine that he was meant to drop off. Dave said that he had bought unsatisfactory drugs from this dealer before. “They’re selling drugs, but they’re not even selling drugs,” complained Dave, adding, “I’m waiting on this guy to do the right thing.” He’s probably still waiting.
  12.  

    When Reporting Stolen Goods Isn’t a Good Idea

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    Jacob Cole was just an entrepreneur trying to sell pills in Deland, Florida back in 2009. His business plan hit a speed bump when his meds stolen were stolen. Having been criminally wronged, he called the authorities. He didn’t have the purloined pills when the police caught up with him, but he did have prescriptions for all the meds that were stolen and a pill crusher.
  13.  

    She Called 911 Over $5 Worth Of Pot. You Won’t Believe What Happened Next

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    Daneshia Heller, a 19-year-old Florida woman, may have made one of the dumbest decisions of 2015 when she called 911 because her would-be weed dealer stole $5 from her. She was arrested on charges of drug possession and misuse of the emergency 911 system, all for a wee bit of a mostly decriminalized drug.
  14.  

    Stoner Calls 911 Asking for Rolling Papers

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    Kyle Dustin Head, 24, was so baked that he accidentally dialed 911 to ask for rolling papers instead of calling one of his friends. Police arrived at the scene and found a strong scent of marijuana coming out of Head’s car. When they opened the door, they found Head with marijuana all over his car; on the seats, the dashboard, Head’s clothing, and even inside of Head’s right ear. They have no idea how the weed got in his ear.

    SOURCE

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