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15 Awkward Sex Stories That Should Have Never Happened –

 

 

“As my boyfriend started fingering me, I felt a painful sensation like my vagina was on fire. I remembered he doused his popcorn in hot sauce and didn’t wash his hands after. I ran to the bathroom in horror, rousing myself with water and silently crying.”

“The condom slid off his penis and got stuck deep inside my vagina. I was about to go to the emergency room until I fished it out with my finger.”

“My first time giving head, his cum shot right out my nose.”

 


“When she got off, she said she didn’t know what to do and asked if I wanted a high five.”

 

“I was giving him head and things got a bit rough. He throat fucked me so hard I got a nosebleed.”

 


“I invited my boyfriend over, and everything seemed to be going great. Then my three-month-old kitten thought it was a great idea to play with his balls. I should mention he’s not declawed.”

 

“I was going down on my boyfriend and he unexpectedly shoved it a little too far back in my mouth. He hit my gag reflex and I threw up all over his penis and his stomach.”

 


“My friend had a party and a guy I had checked out was there, so we started talking and decided to have sex. The only private place we found was my friend’s sauna. When he stuck it in, I felt like something was wrong. I started to feel down my vagina and when I looked at my hand it was covered in blood. We kept going because it didn’t hurt at all and the sex was good. We turned on the lights in the sauna and it was covered in blood. I haven’t told my friend those stains were my vagina blood.”

 


“When I was 19 and still living at home, my mom’s roommate walked in my room to give me the phone and startled my boyfriend. I was on top and I flew backward, whacked my head on my headboard, and was knocked unconscious.”

 

“The guy I was having sex with got a raging case of diarrhea during foreplay. The smell was so bad I threw up on his bed. I didn’t try to have sex again for five years!”

 


“I met this guy and we decided to get it on. Turned out he was a virgin and thought my thigh crease was my vagina.”

“I had sex with a guy who gave me a completely new outlook on the term ‘hot and heavy.’ He was a very sweaty guy, and at some point, he was on top of me and some of his sweat fell straight into my mouth. After that, he left and I was cleaning my bedding and realized his sweat-drenched my sheets. Not just a little bit, you could wring them out.”

“My boyfriend and I were extra adventurous and using my little vibrator, which he then moved to my butt. It was exciting until my butt sucked up the vibrator and it completely disappeared. For someone who has never had butt action, I had to have my boyfriend completely shove his hand up my butt to retrieve it.”

“My high school girlfriend asked me to come over while her parents were out for the day. After sex, I was rubbing my foot on her leg, and so she asked that I use my foot on her and in her next time. Fast forward several days later, I got a frantic call that I’d given her an STI with inflammation, red bumps, and itching. She sent me a picture and it dawned on me that I had transmitted athlete’s foot.”

 

“I shoved my dick into her vagina and it hit a dildo that had been stuck for a week. She screamed in pain and we had to go to the hospital. We didn’t meet up after that.”

“My now husband and I were having sex for the first time. He was super excited because he’d just gotten a piercing down there. About 15 minutes into our first time having sex, we noticed there was blood, EVERYWHERE. His piercing had come off, was inside of me, and he had to fish it out.”

 

 

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