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17 Things That Happen During Sex In Real Life That You Never See In Porn

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Porn always sets such a high standard. You expect me to pull off some of these moves?! These videos aren’t short either, 18+ mins… Yeah… No chance.

I always wonder where the fucking blankets are. Actually, thinking about it… they don’t even use the bed in 90% of the films I researched.

The wonderful people over on Reddit compiled a bunch more of these differences:

1. Apologizing

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2. The wet spot on the sheets. Why is it always on my side of the bed? I swear we could have sex on the washing machine and when I get into bed there will be a wet spot on my side.

3. Somehow I always get the girl’s hair in my buttcrack after sex. I have zero idea how.

4. Conversations like “Okay, I’m tired, you get on top now.”

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5. “Guess I’ll go wipe my dick off now.”

6. Your boner slipping out, but you go to jam it in before realizing it slipped out, and jamming it into her taint, injuring both parties. Sometimes hard enough to end the whole affair.

Furniture always seem to be in way better shape than mine. And they can do so many positions on them

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7. Condoms, and the disposal of the condoms

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8. Getting your foot caught in the sheet.

9. Your six year old kicking the door open because it’s raining and she’s scared it’s going to thunderstorm.

10. People being cold, so all you see is two bobble heads poking out of a mound of blankets.

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11. “I’m squashing you, sorry”

12. Once I was bangin the wife missionary style under a blanket when my 4 year old daughter burst in the room. We stopped and my wife looked up in horror as my daughter climbed on my back and whooped in joy, as she kicked in her heels and acted like she was riding a horse.

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13. Guy trying to put his dick in and can’t immediately find the hole.

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14. All the fart sounds that sweaty bodies rubbing together can make.

15. Trying to put a condom on backwards.

16. Casual requests like “could you play with my tits a little?”

17. long distance nut shots

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