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18 ‘911 Operators’ Admit Their Craziest Calls –

 

 

Man calls to say his wife is in labor and they’re driving to the hospital now. I advise them to pull over (way too far from the closest hospital) and let medical personnel meet them. (If you’re on the road, EMS is not going to chase you down…)

He’s telling me he sees the head. I’ve barely gotten the medical protocol program going when he says “oh my god! The baby’s out! She’s here! The baby’s here!” I could hear the baby crying in the background. So I switch over to the post-birth protocol and make sure everyone’s good as the fire truck shows up and I get off the phone.

I didn’t really do much to help, but to be able to hear that new baby cry and know that everyone was okay and happy made it the best call ever.

–ohTHATone

 

 

Female: There are alligators in the river.

Me: Yes ma’am, this is Florida.

Female: But my kids play and swim in that river.

Me: Why do you let your kids play and swim in alligator infested waters?

–BizzyM

 

 

I am not a 911 operator, but once when I was a kid I called 911 really quick and then hung up, just to see what might happen.

The first responders showed up, talked to my mom, realized everything was fine, and I got off with nothing more than a stern talking-to.

It had a happy ending however since one of the first responders ended up dating and eventually marrying my mom. They’ve been together happily for over two decades now.

–Misanthrope_pengui

 

 

I once got a call from a man who wanted to file a report because he believed his daughter was doing witchcraft on him and he only wanted a deputy that believed in witchcraft to assist him.

–Cuzimawesome86

 

 

Best call I heard was one about an extremely elderly gentleman stuck up in a tree.

He had climbed up to the top of this big maple tree and then forgotten why he was up there. He refused to try to come down, and I guess when the first responders got there quite a few of the neighbors were standing around with blankets in case he fell.

The fire department eventually got him down, although I guess he was kicking and complaining the whole way.

–benevolent_penguin

 

 

 

The funniest call I ever saw was a lady called in wanting officers to intervene at a local lake. She said that two male ducks were attempting to drown a female duck.

–PsychoStryder

 

 

 

Not an operator, but I was at a small, private airport and met with an officer responding to a 911 call.

It was a windy day out and apparently a woman had called the police to complain about a plane that was “stuck in the air.” It was just a small, underpowered plane struggling to make forward progress in the wind. The cop was laughing the whole time as he was “investigating” this “stuck” airplane.

–MSchumi101

 

 

 

We live on a farm with 7 acres. Our house sits at the front of the property and behind the house is the shop, then the grain bins, then our hog operation.

I was cleaning our car out and turned out to my 4-year-old daughter not playing where I last heard her. I called her name and literally searched EVERYWHERE. Went in the house and looked in all the rooms and her favorite hiding spots, not there. Ran out to the shop, she’s not there. Then I panicked and ran to where the pigs are and saw no signs of her.

I then called my husband, he left the field and rushed home. We looked for over 10 minutes before I broke down bawling and called 911. I absolutely have to give credit to our dispatcher and our local sheriff’s office. It takes about 15 minutes to get to our house from town and they were there within 8 minutes while I was on the phone.

As soon as I see the officer, I look over to where we keep our pigs feed (it’s inside the shop) and see two little eyes peeking over the top of the trough. She hid when she thought she was in trouble, I know the dispatcher and she said she cried when she heard we found her.

-schuser

 

 

 

Had a dispatch from a complainant who was “hurt deeply, but not bleeding. Is not sure if he is awake or sleeping” among other things. When I arrived we quickly found the guy who’s first questions were, am I alive? Are you death? Can I get a hug? And proceeded to start crying until I gave him his requested hug.

I managed to convince him to let me give him a ride to the hospital. During the ride, he disclosed that he was recently diagnosed bi-polar and was coming down off salvia which explained a lot. Dude was tripping so hard, really glad he wasn’t violent.

–BlueHerogen

 

 

When I was about 8 I was in Boy Scouts. We went to a Police Station as a field trip. We sat in the waiting area for a tour. While we were waiting a kid (who’s always been a trouble-maker) used the pay phone, dialed 911 and hung up.

Not even 30 seconds later a female cop bursts through the door and fury in her eyes. And yell “who called 911!” No one fessed up so we got a long lecture on how serious it is for prank calling 911. The stupid kid never got caught. Last I heard he’s in jail right now ironically.

–epicnate932

 

 

Not a dispatcher – but I did have to call recently because my (former) drunk neighbor had a habit of setting his house on fire. By this phone call, the house was gone, and only the basement was left. (He was living in a trailer on the property.)

911: “what’s your emergency?”
me: sorry, my neighbor’s basement is on fire.
911: “what?”
me: the basement, is on fire. I know it’s 4 am, but the basement is on fire.
911: “is there a house on top? is the house on fire?”
me: nope. No house there to burn, just the basement.
911: [silence] [whispering] “…how” … “okay I’m dispatching someone, what’s the address?

–WeeklyPie

 

 

 

During some particularly stormy weather:

[Police Emergency]

Hello yes, I’m down by the beach and there is a seal in the water

[…]

Well he just looks like he is struggling a bit

[I’m sorry I’m not entirely sure what you require the Police to do?]

I thought you could come and help it.

[With all due respect, a seal is an aquatic mammal, if it cannot survive in the ocean then I’m afraid that’s a concept called natural selection]

[Plus I’m not sure exactly how much help a Police officer will be to the seal]

Call ends.

I’m informed a few hours later that the person then, complained about me. Speechless.

–Tommo-5oh

 

 

Caller: A deer just swam across the river behind my house.

Me: Okay?

Caller: Well I am worried it might be cold.

Me:…….Well, there is nothing we can do about a deer being cold. Didn’t it run off after swimming the river?

Caller: Yes.

Me: Well ma’am it’s a wild animal and I’d guess it’s going to be fine.

Caller: Ok

–NodePoker

 

 

Had a drunk person call to report he was being harassed. Truth was….. He was being arrested by our officers for throwing pizza at people.

All I heard in the background was one of my officers saying to him “that better not be our dispatcher on the phone” followed by some muffled talking and my officer taking the phone and saying “he will be taking a ride with us now” and hung up.

–tkokilroy

 

 

Guy lived in a rooming house that had a public area where all the residents could hang out. It had a microwave in it provided by the landlord. Guy called 911 around midnight one night because the microwave wasn’t there. The conversation with the dispatcher went something like this:

Dispatcher: “So… you called 911 because a microwave you don’t even own is missing? Did you ask your landlord if he took it?”

Guy: “Uh, no.”

Dispatcher: “Well, that’s not an emergency, sir.”

Guy: “But I’m really hungry.”

–Shaydu

 

 

So this elderly woman calls 911 and it goes like this:

“Ok, ma’am what is your emergency?”

“If my husband has a stroke should I call you?”

“I’m sorry you said your husband having a stroke ma’am?”

“Oh no, he’s fine, I just want to know if I should call you when he does”

“…ma’am is he showing any signs of stroke? Unusual speech? Facial distortion? One side of his body not working?”

“No deary none of that, he’s just getting old and I want to know if that would be an emergency”

–DanHam117

 

 

So this elderly woman calls 911 and it goes like this:

“Ok, ma’am what is your emergency?”

“If my husband has a stroke should I call you?”

“I’m sorry you said your husband having a stroke ma’am?”

“Oh no, he’s fine, I just want to know if I should call you when he does”

“…ma’am is he showing any signs of stroke? Unusual speech? Facial distortion? One side of his body not working?”

“No deary none of that, he’s just getting old and I want to know if that would be an emergency”

–DanHam117

 

 

Had someone call because a bee was in their car. The person wasn’t allergic or anything, but there was a bee flying around.

PD got on scene and opened the door and the bee flew out. Problem solved. Have also had someone come into the fire station to alert us of a dead monkey in the road in front of our station. It was a raccoon that got hit by a car. She swore it was a monkey though.

–IcyYes

 

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