23 Of The Worst Things People Have Actually Said On A First Date



Submitted by Sarah Henry, Facebook Flickr: toyotauk / Creative Commons

2. My date looked out the window on the bus we were taking to an art gallery and said “the sky is the only thing that doesn’t disappoint me anymore.”

I said “oh”.

Submitted by Michelle Goins, Facebook

3. On a first date I heard a noise that sounded like a fart. It was really loud so it would be weird if no one said anything after, so I had to address it and said “oh was that your foot?” giving him the opportunity to save himself from embarrassment.

He said “no, I farted.”

Submitted by maddyw48a343e53

4. “I need to pay in cash so my mom doesn’t question my bank statement,”
and then he proceeded to ask me to buy his next two drinks… at the bar… because we are adults.

Submitted by gabz1016


Submitted by carolineq Flickr: civilon / Creative Commons

6. Once a guy told me that he saw my face in a dream he had a few weeks before the date… before we had any contact with each other. He told me that’s how he knew we were meant to be.

Needless to say, it didn’t work out.

Submitted by matildaa41cf16c42

7. I had a guy tell me on our first date that if he were a dog, he’d be sniffing my ass right now. Very short date

Submitted by chaoticmusings

8. Before even looking up at me from his phone, a guy on a first date with me said “hold on I just have so many Facebook notifications”…. and then after he wondered why I wasn’t amped for a second date.

Submitted by alwayslisa86


Submitted by aliciareneeg Flickr: ph0t0s / Creative Commons

10. I met a guy through Tinder and went over to his place to have drinks and watch movies. When I got there we made the drinks and in his nervousness he suddenly thought it was a good idea to start doing magic tricks.

So five minutes after meeting him I’m standing in his kitchen with a drink in my hand while he is asking me if I have the queen of clubs.

Submitted by annab42065bf60

11. “I can tell we are totally going to date forever.”

Never saw him again after that comment……

Submitted by Laura Kays , Facebook

12. My date once asked me if I ever wondered what people tasted like. I gave him a strange look and he quietly just said “I imagine like chicken,” and continued on with his meal.

Submitted by kellyl4491c724d


Submitted by goldenz Flickr: carlos / Creative Commons

14. Well, I thought I was going on a date with a beautiful girl… turns out she was trying to recruit me to a cult. It began with “There’s this asset you can put money into and you’ll be protected and guided by mentors…”. I left pretty quickly.

Submitted by Morgan Strom, Facebook

15. Guy: Your eyes are gorgeous. Like the sky.
Me: My eyes are brown?
Guy: ……

Submitted by pholly

16. I talked to a guy on the internet for almost a month. When we met up at a coffee shop for the first time, he gets down on one knee and proposes with his mothers ring! I looked like the biggest bitch in the world to the coffee shop, because I said no.

Submitted by Jules Campbell, Facebook


Submitted by Amy Brown, Facebook Flickr: frankdekleine / Creative Commons

18. “You’ve been very motherly towards me,” at the end of the worst Tinder date ever.

Submitted by holliec494cc47c6

19. I was set up on a blind date (we only knew what each other looked like through Facebook pictures). He walks in, finds me, sits down and says “Wow, I’m glad you’re not as ugly as I thought you were.” Needless to say, our date was very short.

Submitted by Ian McEntee , Facebook

20. “I bet you have a lot of wild boars in your garden” – Apparently, it was supposed to mean that I had many guys courting me.

Marie Winchester Mangin, Facebook


Submitted by shannonb44a613678 Flickr: [email protected] / Creative Commons

22. “I want to give you a tongue bath.” The same guy also told me “I want to feel your vaginal walls.”

Needless to say, neither of those things happened.

Submitted by ariezgurl3

23. And lastly…

“Sorry I’m late, I would say the train was delayed but actually I thought I had shit myself. Better to be honest straight away, right? But don’t worry, I checked and I haven’t – where shall we go?”

It’s okay. We got married.

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