AMERICA Bored Food Funny

27 Reasons Why Americans Shouldn’t Be Allowed Near Food

27 Reasons Why Americans Shouldn’t Be Allowed Near Food

Americans should not be allowed near food because they do things like this.

#1Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

Honestly, this is just gross.

2Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

These are things that should really, really not exist.

3Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

Why, oh why, are you deep-frying butter?

4Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

I understand the appeal of deep-frying things. Fried batter is great! But there can be no justification for deep-frying sugar cubes.

5Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

Or deep-fried bubblegum.

6Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

Corn dogs just seem to be confusing. Is it a sausage? In cake? Are you people putting cake around a sausage? Where does the corn come in?

7Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

Nothing here is OK.

8Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

Everything in this sounds nice, but as a whole, what the hell is even happening here?

9Reasons Why Americans Shouldn


10Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

Only a seriously depraved society could come up with Koolickles. Oh yes, that is Kool-Aid-soaked pickles. Pickles, brined in Kool-Aid.

11Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

It is strange to put marshmallows on potato.

12Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

Pizza and burgers are different things. Why would you combine them?

13Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

This is chili and cheese on spaghetti? Spaghetti and chili. What.

14Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

Only America would come up with a doughnut burger.

15Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

The KFC Double Down. Don’t make me explain why a sandwich that uses fried chicken instead of bread is a bad idea.

16Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

Why are snow cones a thing? THEY’RE JUST ICE. JUST LITTLE BITS OF ICE.

17Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

Jerky makes no sense. OK, maybe if you were a cowboy it made sense, but it’s 2016. We sent a probe to Pluto, so why are you chewing on desiccated meat?

18Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

Honestly, chicken and waffles seems weird. But cultural differences – sure, why not? But this is not an OK thing to flavour stuff with.

19Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

This is a brick. Of fried food. In no world should a “brick” be an acceptable way of serving something.

20Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

Same goes for meatloaf. A loaf is not an appropriate way to serve meat.

21Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

Americans shouldn’t do things with food because they end up with this sort of hellaciously unsafe things. Just, y’know, eat the fries, then drive. Or drive, then eat the fries. Why must you do both at the same time?

22Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

This is a peanut butter and jelly drink. Now, sure, peanut butter and jelly is a very American thing that has never really caught on elsewhere. That’s fine, it happens! But a drink?

23Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

I don’t even know what’s actually in this. It’s butter-flavoured butter that actually has no butter?

24Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

How on earth can you flavour a condiment with a different condiment?

25Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

Cheese is not a liquid!

26Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

Cheese should not be sprayed. A country that doesn’t understand the concept of cheese should not be allowed nuclear weapons, let’s be honest.

27Reasons Why Americans Shouldn

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