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Try to get through the day without dying.

You wake up after a full night’s sleep…

You wake up after a full night's sleep...

Tongro Image Stock / Getty Images

1. …too bad you’re dead.

...too bad you're dead.

You sit up…

You sit up...

Creatas Images / Getty Images

2. …jk you’re dead.

...jk you're dead.

You grab a glass of water and toss back a vitamin.

You grab a glass of water and toss back a vitamin.

Moodboard / Getty Images

3. Too bad you’re not just dead—

Too bad you're not just dead--

4. —you’re double dead.

—you're double dead.

You start to get dressed by putting on your bra…

You start to get dressed by putting on your bra...

Razyph / Getty Images

5. …oh shit, you’re dead.

...oh shit, you're dead.

Screw it. You have to get to work. You change into skinny jeans…

Screw it. You have to get to work. You change into skinny jeans...

Fuse / Getty Images

6. …now you’re in the hospital…

...now you're in the hospital...

7. …OK, NOW you’re dead.

...OK, NOW you're dead.

Seriously? OK, fine, you can just slip on some flip-flops and head out—

Seriously? OK, fine, you can just slip on some flip-flops and head out--

Fuse / Getty Images

8. —if you weren’t already dead.

—if you weren't already dead.

9. You’ve got work but the car is stuck in the snow, so you get out your shovel to WHAT NO WHY

You've got work but the car is stuck in the snow, so you get out your shovel to WHAT NO WHY

10. Whatever, just get in the car and drive but wait COME ON

Whatever, just get in the car and drive but wait COME ON

You somehow make it to work. You catch up on emails…

You somehow make it to work. You catch up on emails...

Monkey Business Images Ltd / Getty Images

11. oh no you’re dead

oh no you're dead

That’s it. Screw work. You quit, you retire, you’re gonna GTFO.

That's it. Screw work. You quit, you retire, you're gonna GTFO.

Andreypopov / Getty Images

12. no but HOW

no but HOW

You know what, just clear your head. Just go outside, go for a run.

You know what, just clear your head. Just go outside, go for a run.

Fuse / Getty Images

13. YOUR LIFE JUST RAN OUT OF TIME.

YOUR LIFE JUST RAN OUT OF TIME.

14. NBD. Instead, just stay inside and run on a treadm— (dies)

NBD. Instead, just stay inside and run on a treadm-- (dies)

15. What to do. You could go outside or *death rattle*

What to do. You could go outside or *death rattle*

16. Fine, you can just stay inside are you fucking kidding me

Fine, you can just stay inside are you fucking kidding me

17. I don’t know what you should do! Why am I making decisions for you? Just, idk, do stuff.

I don't know what you should do! Why am I making decisions for you? Just, idk, do stuff.

18. Fine. Avoid stuff and, uh, go online. Check Facebook. Wait, WTF did your roommate just post? *facepalms self to death*

Fine. Avoid stuff and, uh, go online. Check Facebook. Wait, WTF did your roommate just post? *facepalms self to death*

19. You are indignant, so naturally, you tweet your outrage until OOPS DEAD AGAIN THIS WILL NEVER STOP AND YOU ARE SO ANGRY

You are indignant, so naturally, you tweet your outrage until OOPS DEAD AGAIN THIS WILL NEVER STOP AND YOU ARE SO ANGRY

20. OF COURSE

OF COURSE

Take a second. Breathe. You can do this. After all, now it’s your favorite time of day: dinnertime!

Take a second. Breathe. You can do this. After all, now it's your favorite time of day: dinnertime!

Ingram Publishing / Getty Images

21. So you order a soda, aka SUICIDE

So you order a soda, aka SUICIDE

22. You won’t be crying over spilled milk (because you’ll be dead)

You won't be crying over spilled milk (because you'll be dead)

23. Black licorice = black death

Black licorice = black death

24. lol gluten-free nice try

lol gluten-free nice try

25. HAHAHAHHAA

HAHAHAHHAA

26. Better eat something before you lose weight and die, duh

Better eat something before you lose weight and die, duh

27. FYI your immune system fought off that infection just so it could kill you later

FYI your immune system fought off that infection just so it could kill you later

28. If everything can kill you, maybe it’s better to just stay inside and be alone — NEVER MIND!

If everything can kill you, maybe it's better to just stay inside and be alone — NEVER MIND!

I guess this is your life now.

Touchstone / Via google.com

Have fun!

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