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29 COMPLETELY LEGITIMATE EXCUSES FOR GHOSTING

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Ghosting — aka the act of cutting off all communication with someone you’ve been seeing, but no longer wish to be seeing — tends to get a bad rap as a hurtful practice perpetuated by cowards incapable of owning up to the consequences of their decisions or just generally being decent people.

But is that always the case? Below you’ll find some potential justifications for ghosting that might make you see things a little bit differently.

  • Had to finish Orange Is the New Black Season 4
  • Still processing Orange Is the New Black Season 4

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  • Cat has been like, extremely needy recently
  • Actually have been composing a really long reply this whole time, was just gonna hit “send”
  • Got arm-pinned by a boulder while hiking and had to slowly cut through it for survival
  • So many Trump thinkpieces, so little time
  • Had to enter witness protection, have said too much already
  • Carpal tunnel. No, seriously, it’s like, really bad.
  • Just found out what the NSA is and am highly concerned about government surveillance
  • Getting really into CrossFit, haven’t had time for anything else
  • Had a breakthrough and getting SUPER close to figuring out the Kennedy assassination
  • Can’t figure out what beeping sound in apartment is

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  • Learning a new language, wanted to be able to respond in Mandarin
  • Lost phone, had laptop stolen, and banned from public library for some bullshit you don’t really want to go into right now
  • Went too crazy at farmers market and had to get some pickling done, stat
  • Went to hospital with third-degree burns after pickling attempt gone awry
  • Totally sent like 15 texts — wait did you not get them?
  • Seriously? Was actually going to ask you to move in, so had a ton of cleaning to do.
  • Saw Hamilton, realized it was impossible to write anything better, gave up
  • Thinking of moving to England to become part of Queen’s Guard, been practicing silence
  • Trying to process what Brexit means for possible move to England
  • Just took the BEST nap

lamxhGZ[1]

  • Bought a Rubik’s Cube and it’s not going well
  • Got grounded from phone and internet — probably should have disclosed sooner, still live with parents
  • Actually been dead this whole time, Bruce Willis-style
  • Procrasturbation
  • Sudden onset electromagnetic allergy like Jimmy’s brother in Better Call Saul
  • Really terrible service all of the sudden, might switch carriers
  • Am a coward incapable of owning up to consequences of decisions or generally being a decent person

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