Sometimes, it’s not enough just to hold a plain, old-fashioned controller in your hands. No, sometimes it needs to be completely custom, or strapped on to another body part (mind out of the gutter, sickos), or shaped like something you use in the game (usually at the expense of comfort). Here are five ridiculous gaming peripherals of days past.
Resident Evil 4 Chainsaw Controller
I get this controller, released alongside Capcom’s classic Resident Evil 4, in concept, but all it does is make it look like you’re using a VERY tiny chainsaw in a VERY inaccurate manner. Guys, not every nifty peripheral needs to be shaped like an object you find in the game. Although the Saints Row franchise could liven things up by licensing a controller shaped like a big ol’ floppy… uh, disk. Yep, big ol’ floppy disk is what I was gonna say. Remember those? Of course you do.
Tony Hawk Skateboard
I really don’t need to ride my controllers, especially when they’re as poorly designed as this bad boy was. And god forbid you spend your days and nights doing kick-flips and ollies in your living room if you live in an apartment above someone. Are you gonna come talk things out between me and old senile Larry that lives downstairs, Tony Hawk?
Steel Battalion Mech Controller
Holy crap, I feel like I need an engineering degree just to look at this. Of course, a 200-plus button controller is a cool idea in theory, but this is even more daunting than an Expert Dragonforce run on Guitar Hero. What button do I press to curl my mech into the fetal position and have an existential crisis because I can’t figure out how to use a video game controller?!
Nintendo Power Glove
All right kids, let’s all stop pretending this was the coolest periph in town. We all love nostalgia, I get it, but man, the Nintendo Power Glove was just unwieldy. It made you look like the lamest character from the movie Hackers. That said, Nintendo really missed the boat on a potential Huey Lewis tie-in with “The Power of Glove”, AMIRITE?
The Atari Mindlink
The Atari Mindlink was never released, but my god, I wish it was. This infernal device would be strapped to your dome and rather than “reading your mind”, as was advertised, the device would (theoretically) pick up on slight eyebrow twitches. So, guys, FINALLY, a gaming peripheral designed specifically for Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. Do you smell what Atari’s cookin’?
Which household item do you wish your controller was shaped like?
5 of the Most Ridiculous Gaming Peripherals Ever Conceived