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9 NSFW Sex Injuries That Ended Up With A Trip To The ER

 

“Once while receiving a good old fashioned wristy. She pulled down in excitement super duper stupid hard and tore the skin at the base of my knob at the “Front”? Anyway after I shot blood from my dick better then any cum shot I’ve done, it was off to emergency where they said it’s to delicate an area to stitch so he cauterized it. My dick has a small scar but still works fine, thanks.”

fake_not_real_me

 

 

 

“Was fingering a girl and she started bleeding.. first thought it was her period and was just embarrassing so i stopped when i realized and said sorry, but she started freaking out. Said it was no where near her period and it was a lot of blood…

So I got my buddy to drive us to the ER. I hardly knew her and just felt like I must have punched a hole in her or something terrible…

But nope, dr informed her it really was a period. He wasn’t sure why it started so suddenly or why it was so strong compared to previous but no she wasn’t dying from bleeding out.

Just left me confused.”

Billbapapa

 

‘Not so much an ‘injury’ but the treatment and aftermath did hurt a lot.

Condom came off inside me and we didn’t notice until after we were done, both of us tried to look (or feel) for it and couldn’t find any trace.

I ended up in the ER and the doctor tried removing it with tongs, but it was apparently wedged right up in my cervix and the tongs couldn’t reach.

So this doctor with hands like Mr Burns had to lube me up and get in there with his hands to yank it out. It hurt so much and I was completely mortified as my partner was sat next to me watching and was horrified.

I now have a phobia of that happening again and it makes sex with condoms really awkward for me.”

princessstabity

 

 

 

“Not the ER but I did end up at my gyno the next day after I got my clit sliced by someone’s too long fingernail. PSA:please keep your nails clipped and filed.”

bingosgirl

 

 

“Was the doctor, not the patient.

You know those erectile dysfunction treatments that used to be on billboards all over? “LONGER SEX NOW”, etc?
Well, as is often joked about, those treatments advise you to go to the hospital if it lasts longer than 4 hours. Guy came in, having used those treatments, having had an erection for maybe 6 or 8 hours. His dick was purple – not “purple-helmeted warrior of love”-purple, but more “Holding your breath until you pass out”-purple. Also very painful for the guy.

We called the urology registrar (read: resident) to ask him to come and look, and for advice on what to do in the meantime. His answer?
“Take a large gauge needle on a big syringe, stick it right into his glans penis and suck out as much blood as you can.” Then my shift ended. I did not stick around to watch that one.”

ax0r

 

 

“Buddy of mine slammed his dick in my car door by accident. Still beat off a few times that day as a “function check” he says it “ vibrates” randomly like when you think your phone goes off.

EDIT: to answer some questions I’ve been getting.

It was a 1974 plymouth roadrunner, big heavy door.

He was wearing sweatsuit type shorts, bumped the door with his thigh to close it, the dude went in, the whole dude and nothing but the dude.

Yes the door latched, yes he was fine besides being sore and having some bruising.”

Jaymakk13

 

 

 

“One time I was getting a handy from my girl and she decides she wants to use some lube. She goes and grabs what she thinks is Astroglide, pumps a few shots into her hand, and gets back into the game. It feels absolutely amazing, but I noticed that it smelled a little more”chemically” than what it should have been. We finish things up and go to bed shortly after. In the morning I wake up to take a piss and feel a slight sting. Turns out the sting was one of many pieces of dried dick skin that were falling off (it seriously looked like lizard skin). What she had used the night before was not lube, but some industrial strength soap I had taken from one of the labs I worked in at Stanford Medical school. Chunks of skin continued to fall off for the next two days and I could barely touch it for a week because of how bad it stung. I didn’t have to go to the ER, but I certainly learned my lesson.”

MC_Squared_03

 

 

“After doing the deed I had a MASSIVE headache that was like a bomb going off in my head. Wife rushes me to the ER thinking I have busted a brain vessel and having a stroke. ER basically says it happens a lot. Just kept me for observation than let me go when I could see straight again. Has never happened again.”

Oztravels

 

 

 

“I’m uncircumcised, and I tore my frenulum having sex with a girl one time. It’s the little flap of skin that attaches the bottom of the foreskin to the bottom of the head of the penis. Just like the little flap of skin between your lips and gums.

The worst part of it was that I didn’t notice during sex. I pulled out to cum on her stomach, and a torrent of blood and cum spurted everywhere. I looked down and saw it and just awkwardly said “Uh… Problem.”

First we thought that she had gotten her period, which was sorta mortifying for both of us. But after a quick inspection, I realized that I was squirting blood out of my dick. I don’t know if any of the rest of you have ever squirted blood out of your dicks, but turns out that we’ve got millions of years of evolution telling us to protect that little fucker at all costs. So I was freaking the fuck out. Turns out the doctors can’t do anything about it. I put vaseline on it and waited weeks for it to heal up. It never did, fully. Now it’s significantly tighter/weaker than it used to be. Now every time I have sex there’s a part of my brain that’s terrified that it’ll happen again.

Kinda sucks”

Tujio

 

 


“Finally, I can contribute! When I was 17 I was having sex with a gentleman who escaped vaginally and accidentally RAMMED MY ASSHOLE WITH HIS DICK so I immediately flinch in pain, and then the blood starts. I’m bleeding all over. He is sobbing because this pussy ruined his life. We go to the hospital. They fix me. I have to call my mom because I’m a minor and she has my insurance information. I tell her on the phone what happened, she turns to my family (it’s dinner time) and says “we are going to the hospital because your sister is a whore”.

We bring it up every holiday we can.”

survivingcolorado

 

 

 

“1 bottle of Don Julio. 1 string of missing anal beads. 1 week of thinking they were lodged. 1 trip to er out of town. 1 fake name. 1 xray. No beads. Found them weeks later in my makeup drawer. Don Julio is the devil.”

ltlsluttyone

 

 

“Was doing the deed, no thrills nothing fancy. Afterwards we’re sitting on the couch and I feel crampy, so I go into the bathroom, and I sit. That’s when I have the most painful cramp of all time. My boyfriend comes in to see me full blown hysterical tears, calls my mom whose an ER nurse who’s motto as a child was “no bones sticking out or gushing blood? You’re fine”. She drives down immediately and takes me to the ER. That’s when I panic, because if this cold hearted ER Nurse thinks I need to go pronto it’s serious. When we get there it’s slow enough that I pretty much immediately see a doctor…who just happens to be my moms favorite coworker. Awesome. I then try to explain why it hurts and how it happened when my mom blurts out “she was having sex.” The doctor didn’t flinch much, but I sure did. I wanted to die! Thankfully the embarrassment didn’t last long because they gave me amazing pain killers.

Long story short I had sex, had an ovarian cyst burst, horrifyingly painful, went to be ER doctor and my mom were buddies. Good times.”

rlib25

 

 

“Doug was my fourth year college roommate.

One night, Doug is being visited by his girlfriend from out of town. They spend most of their time tucked away in Doug’s bedroom, doing god-knows-what. Doug sneaks out and doesn’t return for several hours. When he comes back, he has an emergency room bracelet on. After some grilling, he gives up the story:

He and his girlfriend are looking for something that might work as a makeshift cock ring. Nothing around except a large padlock. So, she snaps the padlock around his cocknballs. When it becomes clear that it isn’t going to work like they thought it would, they go looking for the key.

So, Doug heads off to the emergency room to get it removed, afraid of losing his giblets to restriction of blood flow. The procedure takes several hours because the doctor has to parade in every other doctor, nurse, intern, and possibly janitor to check out the moron with the padlock stuck around his nuts. Also, they have to take frequent breaks during the “sawing off” due to the heat that keeps accumulating from the friction and burning his genitals.”

twelvesteprevenge

 

“I was going down on a girl and fingering her once when I accidentally cut the inside of her vagina. I took my fingers out and saw blood and was like “Ummm hey, I don’t mean to alarm you but your vagina is bleeding”. I asked if she was on her period and she said no. She was also on birth control at the time so her periods were irregular as shit. I wanted to say a surprise period hit but she texted me the next day saying I did in fact cut the inside of her vagina and that it was sore. I still don’t know how I feel about the whole situation.”

DMNudesforcompliment

 

 

So I get a txt from a guy I work with at 1am saying “hey I wont be able to make it in tomorrow ” naturally I asked why, so he says “I’m in the hospital, it’s really embarrassing ” I press and ask what happened and are you ok. Turns out he was having some hard sex with his girlfriend and went back a little to far, and when he went to go back in he missed the entrance to the cave and hit in between her cooter and thigh, bending his dick in half. I didnt believe him at first, but after some research I found out that it is real. He ended up having to get emergency surgery and was out for 2 weeks. So yea to sum it up my co worker broke his cock”

E_man123

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