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Canada Says Going To Second Base With Animals Is Totally Fine

canada-beastiality-legal

Only sexual penetration with animals is a no-no, ruled Canada’s Supreme Court Thursday, to the dismay of animal advocacy groups and non-evil people everywhere.

The question of just how far you can go with your pet was brought up by the case of a British Columbia man only referred to as “D.L.W.” to protect the identity of his stepdaughters, who this P.O.S. abused while involving the family dog.

D.L.W. was originally convinced of 13 offenses including one bestiality conviction, which he successfully appealed, arguing that there was no penetration during what he forced to go down with the family dog and his stepdaughters. Opponents argued that all sexual acts with animals should be considered bestiality, but the court ruled in D.L.W.’s favor.

He is currently serving a 16-year sentence.

 

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