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Florida Chick Crashes Her Car While Topless Before Trying To Bang The Responding Police Officer

Today’s ‘Florida Man’ Is a Half-Naked Drunk Woman

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Jamie Schmude, a 30-year-old mother, was not at home dealing with her annoying kid, but instead was out driving around drunk and topless, and police evetually caught up to her when she crashed her car. When an officer looked inside her wrecked car he spotted Schmude topless, and her jeans were lowered to her thighs. Oh, and the car smelled like alcohol.
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At the hospital, according to TC Palm, Schumde yelled and screamed at nurses, caused a big scene, fell asleep and woke up again only to burp loudly. What a train wreck. It gets worse. Schumde turned to an officer and said this:

“You are the sexiest thing I’ve seen, I’m going to (engage in a highly sexual act with you).” This was then followed by Schumde biting her lip, moaning and and thrusting her hand in…well…you know. This happened at least three times.

Schumde was charged with a DUI, and when she eventually sobered up, she headed to Facebook to “apologize.” And all that she did was curse everyone out while using this filter.

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What a person.

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