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HERE’S UNDENIABLE PROOF THAT HIPSTERS RUIN EVERYTHING

Hipsters are a group of people society loves to hate. But it is for good reason, I’ll admit. There is absolutely nothing about the hipster lifestyle that seems to make sense, it’s merely a subculture built on redundancies. These pale, plaid-swathed people spend wads of cash on clothes that look cheap, they buy disgusting, cheap beer that tastes like sewer water yet they splurge on expensive produce because it’s “organic” — or so it says.

On top of all this, businesses have amassed wealth and power by catering to these ridiculous people. Of course, I speak of Whole Foods and Urban Outfitters, which I’m sure is where the majority of the items below come from.

Though I’m sure you don’t need it, here is further photographic evidence that proves hipsters ruin absolutely everything.

Gluten-Free Soap
Undeniable Proof That Hipsters Ruin Everything
Because if gluten intolerance wasn’t enough of a farce, now gluten can’t even touch the skin. Well, for hipsters, anyway.

“Hipster Lager”
Undeniable Proof That Hipsters Ruin Everything
Because by re-branding a cheap beer primarily drunk in trailer parks, dudes in skinny jeans will suddenly drool for it.

Tree Stumps As Expensive Decor
Undeniable Proof That Hipsters Ruin Everything
The price reflects that it was chopped by a lumber-sexual.

Asparagus Water
Undeniable Proof That Hipsters Ruin Everything
Because by tossing some sprigs of dated asparagus into water, you can sell the thing for six bucks.

Veganic Sprouted Brown Rice Cacao Crisps
Undeniable Proof That Hipsters Ruin Everything
Because “Cocoa Krispies” are so passe.

Shovels As Plates
Undeniable Proof That Hipsters Ruin Everything
Because plates are for conformists.

Beer Without Tabs
Undeniable Proof That Hipsters Ruin Everything
This beer cannot be opened with the traditional tab. Instead, it is opened using a device that opens beer with dangerous sharp edges. “Opener included!”

Typewriters As Laptops
Undeniable Proof That Hipsters Ruin Everything
No longer a precious part of history, hipsters have made typewriters merely ironic.

VHS
Undeniable Proof That Hipsters Ruin Everything
Redundancies, man!

Kaleamole
Undeniable Proof That Hipsters Ruin Everything
Because hipsters haven taken the kale trend (as they have all trends) too far.

Ornamental Kale
Undeniable Proof That Hipsters Ruin Everything
See what I mean?

Brusselmole
Undeniable Proof That Hipsters Ruin Everything
Evidently, guacamole is a trend among hipsters as well.

Organic Tampons
Undeniable Proof That Hipsters Ruin Everything
“Everything that touches these lips must be organic. Everything.”

Rain Water
Undeniable Proof That Hipsters Ruin Everything
Because you were wrong to believe filtered water is best.

Paper Straws
Undeniable Proof That Hipsters Ruin Everything
Water + paper = no bueno. REDUNDANT!

Urinals
Undeniable Proof That Hipsters Ruin Everything
They’ve even managed to ruin the receptacles we piss in.

Jewelry
Undeniable Proof That Hipsters Ruin Everything
There were so many horrible pieces to choose from, but this guy’s so hipster I couldn’t pass it up.

Entrepreneurship
Undeniable Proof That Hipsters Ruin Everything
This must be in Portland.

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