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This Just In: Having Tons Of Sex And Staring At Boobs Helps Guys Live Longer

Well then, looks like a lot of us will be seeing age 100.

AND you’re going to have even more of a reason to smile because according to Medical Daily, having lots of sex and staring at boobs all day helps the fellas live a longer life.

So it seems that there are six things that help dudes live longer, with staring at boobs coming in at number one. Staring at a woman’s goods creates a poisitive mindset, so of course that goes a long way to living longer. Makes sense. And there’s more great news, folks! Number two on things that help you live longer? You got it, sex!

Those guys that have lots of sex were found to have their “mortality risk reduced by as much as 50 percent.” Having lots of sex can also add between three to eight years to your life. And if you’re stressed sex helps with that, too! Good deal.

But here is where it gets strange. It seems that getting married actually helps fellas live a tad longer. The longer you’re married for, the longer you will live. I’m going to assume it’s because you aren’t alone and have a partner to share your life with, thus creating a positive mindset. Then again, I know tons of miserable married men. So take this as you wish.

Other things that help you live longer include being a parent, assuming responsibility, and get this, having a dad bod. Apparently having a little more weight helps reduce the odds of suffering a heart attack or getting prostate cancer.

In conclusion, continue to stare at boobs, but do it in a way that women don’t think you’re an absolute creep. More so.

 

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