The Miami Zoo Just Killed Harambe’s Grandmother And It May Be Time For An Uprising

The Miami Zoo Just Killed Harambe’s Grandmother And It May Be Time For An Uprising

We lost Harambe the Almighty on the twenty-eighth day of May in the year of our Lord, two-thousand and sixteen. Now Josephine, the grandma of Harambe, was killed by the Miami Zoo.

The “story” that the zoo and the media are feeding you is that on Wednesday she was “euthanized after struggling with years of health problems.” The “experts” believed the reason they had to end Harambe’s grandmother’s life was because the “elderly gorilla was unable to reach for her favorite treat Wednesday morning.” Harambe’s grandma died just before reaching the age of 50.

Can’t reach your watermelon slice nana? Instead of me getting placing it within your reach let me put a bullet in the back of your head.

Josephine was born in the wild in March of 1967 and was brought to the Miami Zoo in 1983. She gave birth to her first offspring, a male named Moja, in 1984.

Moja was relocated to the Gladys Porter Zoo, where he fathered several gorillas, including the one and only Harambe.

Let us not forget, that many in Harambe’s family died from suspicious circumstances.

On January 6, 2002, three gorillas died at the Gladys Porter Zoo after chlorine tablets “accidentally” became wet, creating toxic fumes. One of them was Kayla, Harambe’s mother. Kayla was only 10-years-old when she was prematurely taken from us. Kayla’s 1-year-old son Makoko, who is Harambe’s only one full sibling, also died in the “accident.”

Harambe had a half-brother named Caesar, who was the son of Mary and Moja. Caesar was born on June 26, 1999. Only a few weeks before Caeser’s 3rd birthday he died at the Gladys Porter Zoo in Texas from the “effects of chlorine gas poisoning from January.”

Just when we thought Bush did Harambe comes a shocking new develop from an unverified dossier (there is that word again) that may point the finger at President-elect Donald J. Trump for Harambe’s demise.

This shit has to stop.



(May have to work on that last hashtag)


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