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On Friday, the sheriff’s department in Phoenix caught their man: A 68-year-old from Pennsylvania who traveled across country to procure a horse that he had every intention of f*cking.

USA Today ran footage of the sheriff department’s presser in which Maricopa County’s Sheriff Joe Arpaio gives a play-by-play of the events that led up to the arrest of suspect Michael Crawford, who purchased round-trip air fare and met up with an undercover police officer who was fronting as a horse pimp.

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“Perversion has reached a new level,” according to Arpaio. “I take this crime seriously … It is part of my office’s fight against animal abuse. These animals are not meant to be sex toys for the perverted.”

Of course, Arpaio is certainly on the right side of justice with that attitude — no one would contest that. But the investigation to nab alleged horse-f*cker Crawford began back in October, when detectives began to lure the suspect into conversations online as well as via phone. It wasn’t long into the horse-fucking probe that Maricopa County detectives listened to Crawford admitting to getting a king-size boner over horses, and that he was constantly on the hunt for horse traders who were cool with him fucking them.

Crawford also explained to the undercover dick that he was going to bring five shirts for the horse to take five giant pisses on. This way, he could mail the shirts back to his residence in Pennsylvania and then wear them to assist with his horse-related erections.

It all makes sense, I guess.

Anyway, Crawford was met by undercover officers at the airport and taken to the sting operation where he was arrested for bestiality, a felony in Arizona. Horses everywhere rejoiced.

This is a sick and twisted world.

[USA Today | screengrabs via NYDN]
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