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Well all of my worst fears about staying in hotel rooms have now been confirmed. After reading through these responses from hotel employees about the MOST WTF things they’ve ever seen happen in a hotel I’m now convinced that everything is covered in ass. Maybe that’s a slight exaggeration, but it’s not THAT much of an exaggeration.

This isn’t all bad stuff though, there are some genuinely hilarious WTF stories in here, so get to scrolling! P.s., to read the entire AskReddit thread in full you can click any of the links below, I’ve just pulled the best responses for you bros here to weed out the bullshit.


ladywug

We had a guest we ended up calling “Pie Guy” – he would come into the hotel without a reservation, pay in cash + the $100 cash deposit and the next day we would find his bathroom and bathtub full of the remains of several expensive pies. He never came to the desk for his deposit, as he knew he wouldn’t be getting it back. We added his name to our “do not rent” list but he kept coming back and using different names. One time we found a torn up list in his room with the words “pie” and “pants” scribbled over and over again.


HornyBillyGoat:

I saw a transgender or drag person fucking a midget in the ass in the hotel lobby at 3 a.m in Nashville Tennessee. This was July 4th weekend this year.


greenmouse19:

Had a guy who was racists against white people (he was a old white man). He would only be helped and served by Native Americans, Hispanics, and African Americans, telling us “you can’t trust white people”


CANADIANSARECOMMING:

I work as a lifeguard at a hotel
1) Someone jacking off in the weight room
2) porcupine in the lobby
3) someone neatly stacking all the chairs from the pool area IN the pool while I was out getting towels
4) Lots of prostitutes
5) A water jug thief, who just came into the hotel each week and emptied the weight room water jug all over the floor and took it for recyling money. It took a few months to figure out who was doing it


HBian:

I saw the first world trade center tower struck on September 11th. I just happened to be looking out of a window while vacuuming a room. You usually don’t see planes flying that low with such big buildings…
When you’re in that situation, you think you’re the next target. We are all egocentric like that…so I booked it


usulsspct:

I’ve got a few, but this is the best: Guy comes in with a luggage cart filled with boxes and a VCR. Within 30 minutes, multiple noise complaints of vulgar sounds coming from the room. Multiple unanswered warning calls to the room. I call the Police, they get there pretty quick, and we go up to the room. Noise is not discernible. Knocks go unanswered. Open the room up. VCR is plugged in, porn is on the TV (now muted) with piles of VHS porn tapes (15-20 total) around it. Multiple sex toys and lube spread around the room. No sign of the guy. Leave the room as is until morning. Check on the room in the morning, no sign he’s been back. His stash goes in the dumpster.


powereddeath:

We had to kick some burger convention attendees out when they dumped mayo and relish into the hot tub…


NukeTheNukes:

I used to work at the front desk, and a guy asked if he could use another room to store eleven life size sex dolls.


Jdub90:

I started working right out of high school at a very nice hotel in my city as a dishwasher in the hotel restaurant. Sometimes I would run room service orders to guests if the waiters were super busy. My second week working there I was taking up a meal to the third floor of the hotel just before the kitchen closed. I get off the elevator and I immediately heard faint moaning from the other end of the long hallway but I ignored it at first. I delivered the food to the room right next to the elevator I came out of, and the guest told me she heard loud screaming minutes before I came to the door, she seemed worried. As I was about get back on the elevator the moans continued, I looked towards the end of the hallway to see something on the ground next to the ice machine at the very end of the hallway. I walked over to see what it was and I find a man dressed as a woman, wearing a blonde wig, and wearing a short red dress laying in a pool of vomit while moaning. The strange part about it was that the dress was pulled up and this person had one of those nature valley granola bars shoved almost half up his ass. Eighteen year old me couldn’t comprehend the situation, so I immediately went down stairs and told security and I went back to the kitchen. About 20 minutes later, paramedics arrive and take the lady man away. Never did find out anymore about that person, that whole ordeal is still a mystery to me.
TL;DR Cross-dressing hotel guest passed out presumably drunk next to the ice machine with granola up his butt.


rwebster4293:

This is not that SUPER strange, but it’s kind of a creepy/romantic story.
So I worked valet at this fancy hotel in Virginia and one Friday evening this really nice old couple pulls up and gets us to unload their bags and park the car, all the stuff you do at a fancy hotel. Later that night, they have a nice dinner and drinks out on the town and return to the hotel.
The next morning, someone sees a note on their door that says, “Do not enter, call the police”. It turns out that one of the old people was diagnosed with a terminal, uncurable disease and they decided to take cyanide and both go out together after a nice evening, instead of letting the disease win.
The weekend after this happened, the room was reopened and no one even knew that it happened.


H3lldalg0:

Once, a stoned af guy walked into the lobby at midnight, picked up a decorative rock, walked around the perimeter of the lobby, and then put the rock back. I worked nights, so I got to see all of the drunks.
The wildest drunks were the folks in town for a sheep farmer convention.
EDIT: we also had this super friendly hooker hang out a lot. She was an overweight, middle aged black lady. Her clients were always super nice, and they always looked like they were having a great time. She once told me “Honey, you’re a tall beautiful girl and anyone tells you you ain’t, you tell em to kiss your grits!”


damnablefudger:

While we had a wedding on in the function suite the manager got called through to the restaurant to deal with a woman who was shouting and refusing to leave. She was wearing a dressing gown and wasn’t making a whole lot of sense. The manager finally calmed her down and managed to escort her to reception. While she was sat in reception and the manager was trying to ascertain whether she was a guest or not she started making strange moaning sounds. The manager asked her if she was okay and she replied very matter of factly “Oh yes, I’m just having an orgasm”. She proceeded to piss herself and was escorted away by police. Fun day.


Starkeye311:

Had a guy in a very upscale hotel (> $1500/night) sit in the lobby and smoke several Cuban cigars and drink ~1L of Patron. I guess he had to use the bathroom, so he made his way to the bellstand to ask where the toilet is. After asking and making his way down the stairs, the bellman smelled something and saw a turd on the floor in front of his stand. The gentleman was still walking downstairs and was leaving a trail of turds behind him. He was wearing long pants and they were just tumbling out of the leg hole every few feet or so. He made it to the bathroom and proceeded to smear his shit ridden mess all over the walls of the stall. He left the mess and his pants for housekeeping to clean up.
Once presented with the bill for cleaning the next day, he threatened to write a bad review – since he was a hotel critic and all..
He was blacklisted and never got his pants back.


KillerTulip:

We had a nice couple filming a porn in the hallway once.


homicidalmayonnaise:

I work in a country club restaurant that delivers room service to an attached hotel. Once I was let into a room in which a lady in her underwear was lying on the bed. Not too strange actually. What made me pause was the 7 underwear clad men standing around the room…


redsundance:

I used to work as a server at a high end restaurant at a hotel in Los Angeles. So many weird people both in the restaurant and staying at the hotel.
Aside from typical celebrity drama (inane and specific demands for service like don’t look me in the eyes and don’t have any Mexicans drop off my food, serve my water in your sommelier wine glasses) there were a few incidents I’ll never forget.
There was the middle aged couple in the back of the restaurant who thought it’d be cool to get to third base at the table (shirts off hands down pants loud). That one pissed off another guest to the point they went to the couple and threw water on them, “Your father would be ashamed!”
The very wealthy mother/son incest couple who were super open about it. The son had matching Chanel tattoos on each of his forearms. The mother looked like high as a kite every day.
Having an elderly woman ask me if I was “fucking high” because we didn’t remove the banquettes from the private dining room before her birthday dinner. She threw a fit that would have fit right in on “My Sweet Sixteen” and we wound up comping 10% of her bill.
Professional athletes who would openly discuss how many illegitimate children they had and their disgust at having to pay to support them. Most of them ordered off the children’s menu.
The recently divorced woman who attempted to drown herself in the pool every day for the entirety of her stay. The hotel wound up posting a security guard to watch her at all times.
The people who would take the salt and pepper shakers, plates, cutlery from the restaurant after spending several thousand dollars on dinner.
The young and famous musicians who would leave their used needles on the table.
People who would treat the (5 diamond) restaurant like a nap time/ personal area. The same people would be upset when we asked them not to play music through their phones during dinner service, “I thought this place was all about quality service.”
A CEO of a large TV Corp who would ask to have a tray of cookies sent to the room every night. She would chew every one of them only to put them back on the tray.
Oh, and lots of prostitutes. LOTS.
Many more stories, these are the ones which immediately came to mind.


I feel like it’s pretty easy to gauge the cleanliness of a hotel from the outside/front lobby. When you walk in the front door you usually have a pretty good sense of how nice the hotel is and how much the employees like working there. If it appears to be a shithole on the outside then there’s a reasonable expectation that it’s a shithole on the inside, and probably crawling in all sorts of bacteria.

Well, After reading through these stories I’m not sure I can trust hotels with the ‘eye test’ anymore. From now on I’m sleeping in my car or in a tent, it’s settled.

 

Source

REDDITORS REVEAL – Hotel Workers Shared The Most WTF Things They’ve Ever Seen & Which One Of You Banged A Midget In The Lobby?

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