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STORMY DANIELS IS CASHING IN EVERYWHERE (THOSE 15 MINUTES ARE ALMOST UP)

Not content to be on The ViewJimmy KimmelAnderson Cooper and 60 MinutesStormy Daniels is now set to be on the cover of Penthouse and talk again about the time she had consensual, unprotected sex with Donald Trump then took $130K to not talk about it until Tom Brady threatened her into silence. She really just wants her story out there, it’s not about money. Totally. Not about money at all. Why would you even think that? You’re ridiculous for assuming that.

The issue, which hits newsstands across North America on May 8, brands the porn actress the “Penthouse Pet of the Century” followed by the sub-headline: “Getting Intimate with the Most Wanted Woman in America.” Sources close to Penthouse have informed The Daily Beast that Daniels “talks about everything” concerning her alleged 2011 affair with President Donald Trump during the interview—including several NSFW bits left out of her 60 Minutes chat.

Except, you know, she probably won’t talk about everything, because she hasn’t signed a book deal yet. The only way she’ll talk about everything is if people stop talking about her. That’s how all this usually works.

“We are really excited to have Stormy back on the cover of the magazine,” said Kelly Holland, CEO and owner of Penthouse. “She was a Penthouse Pet back in 2007, so we have a history with Stormy, and she has a good relationship with us.” Daniels’ magazine issue also boasts a “new nude photo spread shot by Keith Munyan,” as well as a “full-length, in-depth interview,” with a reporter for the publication spending “several days with the magazine.”

Yay, a nude photo shoot. If I wanted to see naked pics of a chick the President banged, I’d Google his wife. Or that Karen lady. Not sure if Ivanka has any out there. But you have to give it up for Stormy. Juanita Broaddrick got raped and can’t even get a call from Anderson Cooper or Kimmel. Stormy let Donnie hit it raw and gets a magazine cover and a special place in Democrats’ hearts. All you struggling IG models take note. I know you’re thinking about moving to LA since you got 85 likes on your latest selfie, but if you’re really concerned about your career, you’d bang the President.

 

 

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