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SUMMER ’16 TV STARTS SOON AND YOU MUSTN’T MISS THESE

Summer sun? Who needs it! We’re rolling into summer of ’16 with some shows you cannot miss. While “Jay Leno’s Garage” attempts to be the pathetic man’s “Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee,” both will have summer startup dates. And in addition to the 10 summer shows below, we expect “Hannibal” and “Masters of Sex” to return, despite lower ratings in their last seasons, with looming release dates to be determined.

Take a dive into our summer TV guide and let the sunshine quietly pass by without so much as anembarrassing sunburn, you sad sons of bitches.

“The Ride With Norman Reedus,” AMC (June 12)
Summer '16 TV Starts Soon and You Cannot Miss These
Eh boy, are we really doing this, AMC? This is not how we wanted to lead off, but the man is handsome, we suppose. The AMC quasi-spinoff is exactly what it sounds like, taking Daryl out of “The Walking Dead” and having him escort tourists to random scenic spots while they take selfies. The six, nonfiction hour-long episodes are set to start summer TV off on June 12. Makes you wish he’d been the one they killed at the end of season six.

“Aquarius,” NBC (June 16)
Summer '16 TV Starts Soon and You Cannot Miss These
Returning for season two with a two-hour premiere (no commercials), the Charles Manson origin story will take flight mid-June, despite low ratings in its debut. Though not overtly well-received, the David Duchovny “X-Files” meets “Californication” buddy cop drama is actually an incredible show delving into the life of one of America’s most notorious psychopaths.

“Orange Is the New Black,” Netflix (June 17)
Summer '16 TV Starts Soon and You Cannot Miss These
Season four of the Netflix original series will begin streaming in no time. We’re not sure what’s in store for Piper and her lady friends, but after last season’s “Don’t Make Me Come Back There” and “Trust No Bitch” final episodes, we’re guessing things won’t be handled in a sensible way. Expect hot cat fights. Meow!

“Ray Donovan,” Showtime (June 26)
Summer '16 TV Starts Soon and You Cannot Miss These
Everyone’s favorite Hollywood gangster is suited up for a fourth round after the South Boston family hit some of their big issues at the end of season three. Confronting his sexually abusive childhood, denouncing his religion and watching his brothers fall to pieces while his father (Jon Voight) remains unscathed, Ray is making more moves than ever as he attempts to keep his family intact while exiling his pops. Expect more blood and darker family drama.

“Roadies,” Showtime (June 26)
Summer '16 TV Starts Soon and You Cannot Miss These
Cameron Crowe’s “Almost Famous” is getting a TV adaptation with Crowe attached, as well as J.J. Abrams (yes, more of that guy). Showtime is on a roll and will continue to rock as their momentum turns down a familiar street. Though the cast of “Almost Famous” now won’t be involved, we’ll get a lot of that nostalgic rock tour met by roadie drama that we fell in love with more than 15 years ago. Join the crew on the road as they show you just what makes a good rock show go. And hopefully some poor guy gets deflowered again by a group of strange women. Luke Wilson, Carla Gugino and Imogen Poots will star.

“Sex&Drugs&Rock&Roll,” FX (June 30)
Summer '16 TV Starts Soon and You Cannot Miss These
Speaking of nostalgic rock, Denis Leary is back for another go-around with his new FX musical comedy, which has too annoying a title for us to write again. Set 25 years after his band’s big break, the down-and-out rocker with a hot daughter will continue with his washed-up lifestyle in the modern world at the end of June.

“Mr. Robot,” USA (July 13)
Summer '16 TV Starts Soon and You Cannot Miss These
One of the strongest new shows on the summer circuit, “Mr. Robot” will return after an intense and well-regarded debut season. The show’s original writer has continued penning the series himself, staying true to Elliot’s storyline and delving into his past and the consequences of his hacker actions (hacktions?) while holding out on some of Darlene’s mystery. Season two is expected to be just as riveting as the first, come mid-July.

“Stranger Things,” Netflix (July 15)
Summer '16 TV Starts Soon and You Cannot Miss These
Another new Netflix original for 2016, “Stranger Things” was created and directed by brothers, Matt and Ross Duffer, and focuses on the disappearance of a small boy in a small Indiana town. The show is set in the ’80s and will serve up that uniquely exceptional cinematography we’ve come to enjoy from Netflix, starring Winona Ryder in eight episodes beginning July 15.

“Ballers,” HBO (July 17)
Summer '16 TV Starts Soon and You Cannot Miss These
Season two for the “Rock-ing” HBO show is set to go, despite the loss of its debut counterpart “The Brink,” starring Jack Black. The Rock — excuse us, Dwayne Johnson — and Rob Corddry series welcomes Andy Garcia as a major player for the sophomore season. This summer, it’s all about getting paid and getting respect, which is way better than last summer’s “get laid and lose all self-respect.”

“The Get Down,” Netflix (August 12)
Summer '16 TV Starts Soon and You Cannot Miss These
Baz Luhrmann is taking it to the small screen, as well, this summer with his colorful interpretation of stylish — disco balls and wife beaters — musical drama. With Shawn Ryan of “The Shield” on board creating, the two will deliver a new Netflix original that visits the ragtag crews of the South Bronx in the ’70s, as it transforms from a sizzling broken city into a musical monument. History never looked so good on camera. Check outBreaking Bad B-characters breaking out. Then get ready to get down!

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