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Like Grandma always said, nothing beats a good orgy. Yet while most of us have never had such an experience of our own, movies have been there to give us a semi-censored glimpse. We’re not talking threesomes or foursomes here. This ain’t no game of bridge. These are well-attended affairs with multiple bodies that would make our nana proud. Here are nine famous film orgies.

Eyes Wide Shut (1999)
movie orgies, eyes wide shut
An uninvited guest dressed in a cloak entering a sprawling mansion with a secondhand, non-transferrable password has just placed himself inside a secret society’s wild orgy, and not necessarily the good kind. Instead of the beat of ’70s funk and burning joints there is chanting and incense. There are a few naked bodies a-bangin’, but most stand around the fine furniture and antiques within the grand rooms watching the sparse action while everyone wears a mask. Take the excitement of group sex and the influential style of one of the greatest directors, Stanley Kubrick, mix in the blandness that Tom Cruise delivers when he’s not hanging from an airplane, bar, wire, or spaceship and you’ve got evidence that when the 1 percenters really orgy, the rest of us might prefer to hit the miniature golf course instead. Less pricey and ornate, but more enjoyable holes and poles indeed. (Photo credit: Warner Brothers/Photofest)

Shortbus (2006)
movie orgies, shortbus
What’s a NYC sex therapist to do when she’s never experienced an orgasm of her own? Follow some patients’ advice and check out a weekly underground party celebrating artistic, political, and sexual freedom catering specifically to other misfits and outcasts (including a famous former mayor). John Cameron Mitchell’s follow-up to his gender bending musical carnival “Hedwig and the Angry Inch” boasts non-simulated sex acts and was hence slapped with an NC-17 rating with the delight of a BDSM enthusiast. The final scene of this sweet tale about celebrating the sour notes buried within intimate relationships climaxes in a spontaneous sing-along orgy complete with megaphones, cymbals, tubas and perhaps a long overdue O face. (Photo credit: ThinkFilm/Photofest)

The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975)
movie orgies, the rocky horror picture show
There’s nothing not bizarre about this midnight movie phenomenon and that would extend to its orgy scene. When uninvited guests, groupies and living creations decide to turn on the fabulous Dr. Frank N. Furter, like any scientist might, he turns them all to stone statues, places them on his estate’s stage, reanimates them in hypnotized states, then starts to sing. The song? One of giving into hedonistic dreams, the perfect foreplay to any orgy, really. And if the now smoky platform can turn into a swimming pool, even better. Here all parties dive in and partake in a wet, wild albeit lingerie clad orgy with delighted musical verse releasing from each one. It’s the only transexual, Transylvanian orgy on our list, but nevertheless the best of its kind. (Photo credit: Twentieth Century Fox/Photofest)

Perfume: The Story of a Murderer (2006)
movie orgies, perfume story of a murderer
When your intended execution instead turns into a massive orgy, you’re doing something right. In this film adaptation, a young man with a bionic sense of smell becomes obsessed with capturing the divine scent of women into perfume. On the road to achieving this feat, he, for some reason, needs to murder them to do so. And just to heighten the sense of misogyny, we are expected to consider him the film’s protagonist. Anyway, let’s get back to the rumpy-pumpy. Our hero/psychopath is about to meet his maker when he unleashes the most beautiful of his perfumes out to the throngs who’ve shown up at the town square to see a good hanging before heading to the outlet malls — or wherever people bargain hunted in the 18th Century. So enthralled are they by this ultimate scent that they all drop their waste and petticoats and go at it. Hundreds of them. This by far is our list’s largest orgy and maybe an argument for the controversial practice of capital punishment. (Photo credit: DreamWorks/Photofest)

Caligula (1979)
movie orgies, caligula
Romans may not have invented the orgy, but they sure knew how to perfect it. When you’re the Emperor of Rome, as Julius Caesar was (or “Caligula” to his buds), you could throw an orgy so off the chain (except for the participating slaves) that anything Wilt Chamberlain might have hosted would be put to shame. Produced by Bob Guccione — the Emperor of Penthouse Magazine — this is the wildest of our movie orgies, led by a maniacal commander-in-chief who was clearly not looking to bolster his family values credentials. There are beautiful bodies here, dressed and undressed in flowing Roman garb, a chaotic scene of writhing flesh that mirrors the political chaos this film’s version of Caesar thrust upon his empire. (Photo credit: Independent Artists/Photofest)

The Idiots (1998)
movie orgies, the idiots
In provocateur director Lars Van Trier’s hands, a group of adults’ pact to act as mentally challenged idiots in public for kicks takes some truly unsettling turns. For one of the participant’s birthday parties, their experiment in shedding all normal inhibitions takes a sexual turn when he requests a gang bang. Clothes are quickly removed and most of the group get their orgy on. While we don’t expect the act to crop up in any of the latest Disney offerings, a pattern we’re seeing here is that cinematic representations of orgies are reserved for darker narratives. Regardless, “The Idiots” has made us rethink asking for a simple gift certificate on our next birthday. (Photo credit: USA Films/Photofest)

Kids (1995)
movie orgies, kids
Think growing up in NYC would be a wonderful experience? Twenty years ago director Larry Clark reminded us that this might not be the case. Controversial upon its release for its shocking portrait of city kids painted with broad strokes of alcohol, drug use, peer pressure, sexual abuse and HIV infection, his Big Apple is rotten for sure. At an unsupervised house party, these high schoolers, flanked by shockingly young children emulating their elders’ behavior, participate in a dim, sweaty, disheartening orgy. We are spared open scenes of this group sex and any nudity that might accompany it, but just knowing what they’re going through is no less graphic. (Photo credit: Miramax/Photofest)

Eating Raoul (1982)
movie orgies, eating raoul
Our darkness continues, even in this light ’80s comedy. A destitute, prudish married couple with no love for sex are thrust into the world of swinging when they realize that killing off what they consider to be depraved perverts can be a very lucrative venture. As we get close to the end of our list, again, there’s little beauty in this bacchanal either. No post-coital group pleasure here. Instead, when our murderous couple crash a swanky swingers house party, they see opportunity when all the naked guests spill out of the living room into a large hot tub. The lovemaking lots’ good time is ended abruptly when an electric heater is tossed in among them. Once again, the film universe has taken a good old fashioned orgy and brought in a heavy dose of black. (Photo credit: 20th Century Fox/Photofest)

A Good Old Fashioned Orgy (2011)
movie orgies, good old fashioned orgy
If an orgy is a good place to meet new friends, how would you handle it if all your old friends are members of your orgy? That’s the provocative premise of this Jason Sudekis comedy. When a cherished party house goes on the market, its owner’s son, unable to accept his full-blown (no pun intended) adulthood, decides to throw one last theme bash with his friends. His choice: orgy. It’s not dark, these aren’t misfits, but if your climactic orgy sequence belongs on Comedy Central more than Cinemax, there might be a misfire here (pun intended). It features lots of sarcasm and jokes, the actors are mostly covered up by blankets, pillows, or curtains, and they seem to be eating snacks more than getting biz-ay. Finally, someone adds an orgy to a screwball (not sure about that one) comedy and it ends up feeling like a bad improv contest held at an Ikea.(Photo credit: Youtube)

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