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Uh Oh, Porn.com Acquires ClownSex.com

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s we noted a few weeks back, the recent uptick in creepy clown sightings has correlated with a significant uptick in the demand for clown porn. (Margot Robbie’s portrayal of Harley Quinn in the movie “Suicide Squad” may also have something to do with it.) Now, in a move as disturbing as it was inevitable, Porn.com has purchased ClownSex.com in hopes of cashing in.

In a statement to XBIZ, Porn.com spokesman Jack T connected the increase in clown-related search terms with the recent rash of creepy clown sightings and promised to meet the growing demand for high quality videos of the nightmare creatures doing it:

“In early October there was a 173 percent increase in clown-related searches over the previous months,” Jack says. “This increase in searches such as ‘clown porn,’ ‘clown sex’ and ‘sexy clown’ are undoubtedly due to the unexplained sightings.”

Jack notes that as industry leaders, the team at Porn.com is working to meet and exceed the needs of clown sex lovers everywhere.

“We saw an opportunity and jumped at it,” explains Porn.com VP Charles Anderson. “Clowns can generate some powerful feelings in people [and] so will our content.”

What better way to deal with your fear of clowns than by watching them make even more clowns inside each other?

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A blog post on Porn.com (NSFW) elaborates on the trend using graphs flanked by clowns in various stages of arousal. “Forget knocking boots, now it’s all about knocking clown shoes,” the site’s Rex Ridgewood writes. “Terms and phrases like ‘clown porn,’ ‘clown sex’ and ‘clown fucking’ had the most notable increases. The people have spoken.” And who is Porn.com to defy the will of the people?

As of now, a visit to ClownSex.com reveals a landing page promising all manner of colorful depravity, including what looks like a clown-ling spawning from the business end of a particularly vengeful-looking wraith. (I guess LA County’s “condoms in porn” law only applies to earthly beings.)

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Check back soon for a cavalcade of horrors that are no doubt being committed to video as we speak.

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