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Well British Politics Went Completely Mad Yesterday

Good morning, America! We’re going to tell you about a thing that happened in London yesterday, even though it’s really, really embarrassing.

Basically, there was a naval battle on the Thames. That’s the river running through the middle of London, for those of you who have never visited this baffling, uncomfortable country we call home.

It happened because of the EU referendum. Perhaps you haven’t heard about this yet, because you are very, very lucky.

The tl;dr of the EU referendum is that next week British people are voting on whether they want the UK to leave or remain in the European Union. The EU currently has 28 member states, most of which share a currency and freedom of movement.

The tl;dr of the EU referendum is that next week British people are voting on whether they want the UK to leave or remain in the European Union. The EU currently has 28 member states, most of which share a currency and freedom of movement.

Matt Cardy / Getty Images

Here’s the EU and UK flags fluttering in the wind. There, you’re up to date. Now let’s get to the embarrassing bit.

So. Today the two sides in this debate – “Leave” and “Remain” – GOT IN A BUNCH OF BOATS AND TOOK TO THE WATER. THEN LEAVE SHOT REMAIN WITH WATER HOSES IN THE MIDDLE OF THE THAMES WHILE REMAIN BLARED TERRIBLE MUSIC.

It all started when a flotilla of pro-Leave craft – mostly fishing vessels – gathered at sea and then steamed up the Thames Estuary towards London, in order tomake a point.

“Brexit” stands for “British exit” from the EU. Pro-Brexit is the same as pro-Leave.

Of course, the pro-Remain side would not stand for this incursion into their territory. So naturally they sent their own boat with former Boomtown Rats singer and prominent philanthropist Bob Geldof in it, to harrass the oncoming Leave fleet.

We cannot stress enough how strange this all is.

Here’s Geldof, surrounded by supporters, making what is in Britain a very rude hand gesture.

Here's Geldof, surrounded by supporters, making what is in Britain a very rude hand gesture.

Ben Stansall / AFP / Getty Images

As time went on, the Remain forces grew in strength while the Leave flotilla drew ever closer. The Remain craft tried to gain a psychological advantage by playing pop music loudly at their enemies.

And this is the “admiral” of the Leave flotilla. His name is Nigel Farage, and he’s the leader of the UK Independence Party, which, as its name suggests, wants us to get out of the European Union.

And this is the "admiral" of the Leave flotilla. His name is Nigel Farage, and he's the leader of the UK Independence Party, which, as its name suggests, wants us to get out of the European Union.

Jeff Spicer / Getty Images

He’s a bit of a…controversial figure in Britain.

Anyway, eventually the sides clashed – and one of the most important political decisions in modern UK history came down to a bunch of angry fishermen spraying a singer from the 1980s with water.

To be absolutely clear, this all actually happened. For reference, imagine if Donald Trump and Hilary Clinton and Paula Abdul got in some kayaks on Lake Michigan and shot water at each other.

War is hell.

Here’s a pro-Leave fishing boat. Lots of people in the fishing industry think we should leave the European Union, which regulates what they can and can’t fish.

Here's a pro-Leave fishing boat. Lots of people in the fishing industry think we should leave the European Union, which regulates what they can and can't fish.

Jack Taylor / Getty Images

That’s why they’re spraying this Remain boat with hoses, like playful friends at a fundraising carwash, except if the friends hated each other and thought their friendship was being over-regulated by faceless European bureaucrats.

And here we have another one of the pro-Leave boats, bearing a sign expressing concern about the threat of the EU to British sovereignty.

In British culture, it’s common to insult someone by saying that an embarrassing older gentleman is that person’s father, i.e. “yer da”.

Of course, this is not London’s first floating protest.

It helps that the House of Commons backs on to the Thames, so that one’s elected representatives have a clear view of one’s floating protests.

Anyway, as the day went on, things got really out of hand.

Apologies to all tourists visiting London today.

There was boat-ramming.

Accusations flew.

Greenpeace got involved.

Lots of people came out to watch the mayhem and support their side.

Lots of people came out to watch the mayhem and support their side.

Niklas Halle’n / AFP / Getty Images

Nigel Farage and his fellow Brexiteers were very proud.

But mostly the whole thing was very, very strange.

But mostly the whole thing was very, very strange.

Jack Taylor / Getty Images

So just remember, America, you don’t have a monopoly on weird, awful politics.

Source  I AM Bored

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